Friday, September 23, 2005

An informal poll and an excuse for a joke

Women wash their hands more often than men after using a public restroom.
It's a good idea after being in a jail, too. However, I almost always shake hands with my clients, except the ones with their hands down their pants. How about the rest of the PD world?

So there's a Navy Lieutenant and a Marine Gunny in a bathroom. The Gunny finishes up at the urinal, zips up, and heads for the door. The Lieutenant tells the Gunny to stop, and tells him, "Gunnery Sergeant, at the Academy, one is taught to wash one's hands after using the lavatory." And the Gunny replies, "Sir, in the Corps they teach us not to piss on our hands."

And now you know why I'm an attorney and not a comedian.

Jack

4 Comments:

Blogger Blonde Justice said...

My clients ALWAYS have their hands down their pants. What's up with that?

I'm not shaking anyone's hands. I don't need... cooties or whatever they have. Yick.

9/23/2005 8:52 PM  
Blogger Audacity said...

I shake hands.

But after coming down with a cold this past week - after spending some time in the jail - I think I'm going to buy stock in Purel and keep bottles of it with me at all times.

9/25/2005 11:27 AM  
Blogger Melissa said...

Now I know why 4 out of 5 public defenders have Purel in their bag.

9/27/2005 4:09 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

In the last 6 years, i've spent about 5,000 hours inside jails & prisons (i was in the middle among my other investigator / paralegal friends - we all had a pitcher of cheap beer & we all had cel phone calculators on us). Somewhere around hour 650 or so, i started bringing a "tester sized" bottle of Purell into the jail w/ me. None of my clients was offended & usually (except for the ones who'd had their hands down their pants) asked to use some too. At first everyone in the office thought i'd gone a bit nutty, till they started doing the same thing (after a statewide staph outbreak). So far so good. Then, about hour 1500 or so, i really did go over the edge. There were ECONOMY SIZED! Purell pump bottles on my desk, in the office car glove box, & in my house. When i finally saw the Aviator, i got a hard elbow in the ribs over the hand washing / OCD thing (& the gratuitous comment, "too bad you don't got his cash"). Two lessons here: (1) all jails are (unconstitutionally) filthy; (2) filthy jail make you crazy.

9/30/2005 2:46 PM  

Post a Comment

Links to this post:

Create a Link

<< Home